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Writer's pictureJansu E

R.A.I.N. & Other Compassionate Grounding Strategies

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As you engage with these grounding strategies, remember that your healing is a powerful and necessary act of resistance. In a world that often tends to diminish, erase, or harm us, especially for BIPOC and Queer folks—whether through systemic oppression, societal expectations, or individual struggles—your well-being is a revolutionary act. Every moment you take to care for yourself, to ground yourself, and to reclaim your peace is a declaration of your right to exist, to thrive, and to heal on your own terms.


Healing is not an individual endeavour, but a collective one. It’s intertwined with the broader fight for justice, equity, decolonization and liberation. When you care for yourself, you are participating in the work of breaking cycles of harm and injustice. You are not just healing for yourself, but for the communities you belong to, and for those whose names and stories are often left out of the conversation.


This journey is not about perfection or speed—it’s about honouring your unique path and embracing the process of reclaiming what is yours. Each moment of care, each step toward grounding, is part of the radical act of healing that serves not only you but also the communities and movements you are a part of. You are the expert of your life, and only you can know what your healing needs in each moment. Again, my hope is for you to remember, your healing is woven into the collective liberation of all. Take your time, trust your SELF, and know that every effort you make contributes to a more just and liberated world.


 

R.A.I.N. stands for Recognize, Accept, Investigate, and Nurture with Self-Compassion. It offers a simple yet profound framework for working with difficult emotions and challenging situations with mindfulness and compassion. The steps to R.A.I.N. are as follows:


  • Recognize: The first step of RAIN is to recognize what you're experiencing in the present moment. Begin with acknowledgment—bringing gentle awareness to whatever thoughts, feelings, or somatic sensations are arising within you. Through this recognition, you create space for greater self-awareness and insight into your inner landscape.

  • Accept: Once you've recognized what you're experiencing, the next step is to accept it with radical acceptance and compassion. Embrace your experience without judgment or resistance. Instead of pushing away or suppressing difficult emotions, allow them to be present with an open heart and a spirit of kindness.

  • Investigate: With acceptance as your starting point, it's time to take a closer look at what's going on inside you. Gently ask yourself questions about your thoughts, feelings, and sensations. Where in your body do you feel these emotions the most? What thoughts are swirling around in your mind? Are there any patterns or triggers you notice? Take your time to explore these questions with curiosity, like you're unraveling a mystery. Remember, there are no right or wrong answers—just a deeper understanding of yourself.

  • Nurture with Self-Compassion: Lastly, it's time to treat yourself with kindness and care. Imagine you're comforting a dear friend who's going through a tough time. What gentle words of encouragement would you offer? What gentle movements can you practice? Now, turn those words inward and offer them to yourself.


 

What we GET TO practice with self-compassionate strrategies & R.A.I.N.


We GET TO go from autopilot to awareness; from judgement to curiosity; from dismissing to nurturing our big feelings. R.A.I.N is a tool for transformation, guiding you from reactivity to awareness, and ultimately, to create self-compassion. The goal of practicing R.A.I.N. is to fully experience and understand your experience with kindness and compassion, rather than get rid of emotions or try to “fix” them. With R.A.I.N. you are practicing making space for what’s happening within you, allowing you to meet difficult emotions with a presence and kindness.


 

R.A.I.N. in Action


R- Recognize

Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, allowing yourself to arrive fully in this moment. Now, gently turn your attention inward and notice what thoughts, feelings, or sensations are present for you right now. Without judgment or analysis, simply recognize whatever is arising within you. It might be a sense of anxiety, a feeling of sadness, or perhaps a physical sensation of tension or warmth in your body. Whatever it is, acknowledge it with kindness and curiosity, knowing that it's okay to feel whatever you're feeling in this moment.

Reflections to Consider

  • What emotion or sensation are you experiencing right now? Take a moment to tune into your inner experience and identify the primary emotion or sensation that's present for you.

  • Can you name it? Sometimes, putting a label on your feelings can help you gain clarity and understanding. Try to articulate what you're feeling in words, such as anxiety, sadness, frustration, or joy. Tip: Utilize a Feelings Wheel.

  • Where do you feel it in your body? Emotions often manifest as physical sensations in the body. Notice any tightness, heaviness, warmth, or other sensations, and identify where in your body you feel them most strongly.

A- Accept

As you continue to hold your experience in awareness, practice radical acceptance and self-compassion. Allow yourself to fully accept and embrace whatever is present for you right now, without trying to change it or make it go away. Recognize that difficult emotions are a natural part of the human experience and that it's okay to feel vulnerable or uncomfortable at times. Offer yourself words of kindness and understanding, saying to yourself, "It's okay to feel this way. I am here for myself with love and compassion."

Reflections to Consider

  • Can you acknowledge and accept this emotion without judgment? Practice observing your emotions with an attitude of openness and non-judgment. Allow yourself to experience the emotion fully, without trying to change it or make it go away.

  • Are there any thoughts or beliefs you're struggling with related to this emotion? Notice any accompanying thoughts or beliefs that might be amplifying or prolonging the emotion. Acknowledge these thoughts without getting caught up in them.

  • Can you give yourself permission to feel what you're feeling without trying to change it? Remind yourself that it's okay to feel whatever you're feeling in this moment. Offer yourself permission to experience the full range of human emotions without judgment or resistance.

I - Investigate:

With an attitude of gentle curiosity, explore your experience more deeply. Notice where in your body you're feeling the emotion or sensation most strongly. What thoughts or beliefs might be contributing to this feeling? Are there any underlying needs or desires that are seeking your attention? Take your time to gently inquire into the roots of your experience, allowing whatever insights arise to unfold naturally. Remember to approach this investigation with an open heart and a spirit of non-judgment, knowing that you are simply seeking to understand yourself more fully.

Reflections to Consider

  • What triggered this emotion or sensation? Reflect on the circumstances or events that led to the emergence of this emotion. Notice any specific triggers or cues that may have contributed to its intensity.

  • Are there any underlying thoughts or beliefs contributing to it? Explore the underlying thoughts, beliefs, or interpretations that are shaping your experience of this emotion. Consider whether these thoughts are accurate or helpful.

  • Have you experienced similar emotions or situations in the past? Reflect on any past experiences or patterns that may be influencing your current emotional state. Notice any similarities or differences between past and present experiences.

  • What patterns or tendencies do you notice in how you respond to this emotion? Take a step back and observe how you typically react to this emotion. Notice any habitual responses or coping strategies, and consider whether they are serving you well

N- Nurture with Self-Compassion:

As you conclude this practice, offer yourself the gift of self-compassion and care. Bring to mind a gesture of kindness or support that resonates with you, whether it's placing a hand over your heart, offering yourself a comforting phrase, or simply taking a moment to breathe deeply and send yourself love. Remind yourself that you are worthy of compassion and deserving of kindness, just as you are. Take a few moments to bask in the warmth of your own loving presence, knowing that you can return to this practice whenever you need to nourish and nurture yourself.

Reflections to Consider

  • How can you offer yourself kindness and support in this moment? Consider what you need most right now to soothe and comfort yourself. This could involve offering yourself words of encouragement, engaging in self-care activities, or seeking support from others.

  • What words of comfort or encouragement would you offer to a friend going through the same thing? Imagine you're offering support to a dear friend who's experiencing a similar emotion. What would you say to them to convey empathy and understanding?

  • Can you offer those same words to yourself? Extend the same kindness and compassion to yourself that you would offer to a friend in need. Speak to yourself with gentleness and warmth, recognizing your own inherent worth and value.

  • What self-care activities or practices could help soothe you right now? Identify specific self-care strategies or activities that you can engage in to nurture your well-being. This could include activities like taking a walk in nature, journaling, practicing mindfulness or meditation, or engaging in a creative outlet.


 

Compassionate Grounding Strategies

5-4-3-2-1

  • Name 5 things you can see: Look around and identify five things in your environment, briefly observe and describe details of each item (e.g. shape, color, texture)

  • Name 4 things you can touch: Focus on 4 things you can feel with your body. If possible, touch these objects to deepen the grounding. (e.g. I feel my feet on the ground, and it feels cold)

  • Name 3 things you can hear: Tune in with the sounds in your environment, notice the quality of the sounds - are they near, are they far, loud or soft?

  • Name 2 things you can smell: Focus on the scents around you. If you don’t notice any smells, consider your immediate environment or bring a comforting scent nearby, like essential oils or coffee.

  • Name 1 thing you can taste: Focus on one thing you can taste, even if it’s just the lingering taste in your mouth. If nothing comes to mind, take a sip of water or eat something small and notice the flavour.

Box Breathing · 

  • The square shape of the breath cycle can be a simple and effective way to promote relaxation and focus.

  • · Inhale slowly through the nose for a count of 4

  • · Hold breath for a count of 4

  • · Exhale slowly through the mouth for a count of 4

  • · Pause and hold breath for another count of 4

Five-finger Breathing

  • Hold one hand up, palm facing you, and spread your finger wide.

  • Use your index finger of your other hand as a “tracer”

  • Place the tracing finger at the base of your thumb, ready to trace up the outer edge.

  • Slowly inhale deeply as your tracing finger moves up the side of your thumb toward the

  • Exhale fully as you trace down the other side of your thumb.

  • Let the exhale be steady and calming.

  • Move to your index finger, inhaling as you trace up, and exhaling as you trace down.

  • Repeat for each finger until you’ve traced your whole hand.

  • After completing the exercise, notice how your body and mind feel. You can repeat as needed if you want to deepen the sense of calm.

Voo Sound Toning (Polyvagal Informed Vagus Nerve Activation)

  • Sit or lie down in a comfortable position where you feel safe and supported.

  • Place one or both hands on your stomach or chest to connect with your breath.

  • Breathe deeply through your nose, allowing your belly to expand as you inhale.

  • Slowly exhale while making a low, steady “vooooooo” sound.

  • Feel the vibration of the sound in your chest and throat as you sustain it for as long as your breath allows.

  • After each exhale, pause briefly and notice any sensations in your body. You may feel warmth, tingling, or a gentle sense of relaxation.

  • Continue the process for 5–10 rounds or as long as it feels helpful, adjuusting the tone and volume of the “voo” to find what feels most soothing to your body.

  • The low-frequency vibration created by the Voo sound stimulates the vagus nerve, which plays a key role in regulating the nervous system.

  • This can help shift the body from a state of fight-or-flight (sympathetic activation) to rest-and-digest (parasympathetic activation).

Butterfly Hug- Bilateral Stimulation

  • Cross your arms over your chest so your hands rest just beneath your collarbones.

  • Gently tap one side beneath your collarbone, then the other, alternating sides. Keep the tapping light and steady.

  • Breathing slowly, inhale through the nose and exhale through the mouth, like you’re blowing out a candle.

  • Match your tapping rhythm to your breath if it feels natural.

  • Continue until you feel grounded or relaxed. Stop when ready, and take a moment to notice how your body feels.

  • This is a powerful self-soothing and grounding technique frequently used in trauma recovery, especially in EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) therapy. This method involves bilateral stimulation through rhythmic tapping, which helps regulate the nervous system and promote a sense of calm. It engages the parasympathetic nervous system helping the body move from a state of fight-or-flight to rest-and-digest. Supports emotional regulation by creating a rhythmic, calming sensation that interrupts spiralling thoughts or overwhelming emotions. Increases mind-body connection, fostering self-awareness and grounding in the present moment.


 

Printable Grounding Strategies

Below you will find several printable visuals. My hope is to create an accessible way to utilize these skills - on the go - whether it be by printing them and positioning them in areas that feel fit or using the images as your phone background.

Enjoy!


two hands doing a butterfly hug to compassionately regulate nervous system

a person sitting under the rain with acronym of R.A.I.N to support with grounding

the grounding strategy of 5-4-3-2-1 is described with pictures of each sense
5-4-3-2-1

 

A Note & Gentle Reminder from Jansu


The concept of R.A.I.N. originates from mindfulness and self-compassion teachings, introduced by Michelle McDonald and beautifully expanded upon by Tara Brach. While I do not claim ownership of the concepts introduced here, this document offers additions, designed to help you explore the concept in ways that resonate with your unique experiences. These insights have been further enriched by the reflections and feedback of my clients, whose voices continue to inspire and shape this work.


I hope this document serves your needs and desires. Every step you take to support yourself, no matter how small it feels, is a meaningful act of care and self-love. Each moment you take to reconnect with yourself is a step toward healing and resilience. Be gentle with yourself—you’re doing the best you can, and that is enough. You are worthy of kindness, both from others and from yourself.


As a gentle reminder, your thoughts and experiences are important to me. If you’d like to share any feedback or have questions about the psychoeducation provided or the grounding strategies included here, please don’t hesitate to reach out. I’m here to listen and support you on your journey.


As always, sending you my best.

Jansu Edis (she/her)



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